Lets face it, when you look as stunning as my friend here, you won’t have any trouble Getting Anyone To Like You and Listen to You-alas though, not all of us are blessed in this way, which means we need to possess an arsenal of alternative scientifically proven psycholgical weapons to get ahead in the Persuasion stakes….This is what this  blog is all about. Get Ready, you won’t be disappointed!

PS. No offence to any female visitors who may read this blog, but it would have been awkward for me to include a picture of an attractive male (other than myself of course!!)

Anyway to the matter in hand; the reason why we like or dislike somone and vice versa, is based upon a strict set of unconscious processes, it does not happen by chance. The following will be a discussion of nine psychological laws which influence, affect and alter what someone thinks of you and how you can get anyone to like you. Keep in mind though that research shows that the more we like someone, the more attractive they are to us.

1. THE LAW OF ASSOCIATION By pairing yourself with pleasurable stimuli, another person will  associate you with this feeling. Equally the reverse also holds true, so if you are around someone who is feeling distressed, those feelings will become unconcsiously associated to you as well and they will like you less. The strategy here is therfore to be around this person when they are in a good mood or excited about something.

2. REPEAT EXPOSURE The old adage ” familiarity breeds contempt” is commonly accepted but interestingly enough, its not true. Repeated exposure to  any stimulus, in this case a person, leads to greater appreciation and liking. The more you interact with somone, the more he or she will like you, assuming of course the initial interaction is a positive one. This law can also be aplied to things, places or products, which explains why companies sometimes advertise  just the picture of their product without stating any features or benefits. They don’t need to tell us how wonderful it is, only remind us of it.

3. RECIPROCAL AFFECTION Countless studies (and common sense) have established that we tend to like those more who like us. So when we discover that someone thinks well of us, we are unconsciously driven to like them more as well. So the tactic here is to let your intended target know (via a third party) that  you like  or respect him or her. But what if  the person really doesn’t like you? (Find someone else.I’m not a magician!).. just kidding Well you can take heart from the fact that studies show, that if someone gradually begins to like you from this unfortunate position, thenthey will eventually end up liking you more than if they had liked you from the beginning. The  operative word here is gradually, don’t try and be their best friend all of a sudden.

4. SIMILARITIES It is not true that opposites attract. We actaully like those that are similar to us, or those who have shared similar experiences. When you speak to someone new, you don’t speak about your differences but commom interests you both share. People can become good friends instantly through this natural beheviour.

5.HOW YOU MAKE HER FEEL How someone feels about you is greatly determined by how you make her feel about herself. You can spend all day getting her to like you but it’s how you make her feel about herself when she is around you that makes the difference.

6. RAPPORT. Rapport creates trust, allowing you to build a psychological bridge to someone. Rapport can be established through matching and mirroring posture, movements and speech patterns. You need to be subtle here. Once you are ”In Sync” you are then ideally placed to lead the other persons behaviour.

7. HELPING HER OUT Studies show that it is human nature to dislike someone more after doing them harm. We need to justify to ourselves why we would have done this person harm, it must be because they are be a bad person. It is a way of rationalising our actions to remove the inner conflict. Simlalry the opposite is also true, we like someone more after we do something nice for him or her. So the technique here is to get the object of your desire to do you a small favour, not the other way round.

8.HE’S ONLY HUMAN When somone you admire does something silly or clumsy, it only makes you like them more. Oddly acting cool and confident has the effect of making you appear as someone who takes themselves “too seriously”. It’s your ability to laugh at yourself that shows you as a confident person.  A confident person doesn’t need to tell the world, he is, he lets the world find out for itself.

9. POSITIVE ATTITUDE. This one is obvious, no one wants to be around a pessimistic person , who sucks out all their energy.